Unrightful Jealousy

When I got home, it was still the same. I've already take my own ride because Cedrick has already sent a text to me saying that he won't be able to come to pick me up. Maybe they enjoyed their date too much today.

It's eight o'clock but they're still gone. Maybe they will be spending this night away together, sleeping next to each other, and having warm cuddles.

That's them. And this night I'm cold.

I drink water after I eat. I was about to put the plate I ate on the sink but stopped when my cellphone buzzed on the table. I looked at it and Trevor's chat opened my eyes. I raised one eyebrow and frowned while reading.

Trevor Cervantes: you forgot to set an exact time of our schedule. you just said afternoon, you didn't write the time.

I

didn't pay attention to that even though I saw it and continued what I had to do. His tone in the chat... it's like it's my fault, huh? What if he reviewed it a while ago when we were still in the classroom so he doesn't message me now? I know that even typing a letter on the keyboard is accompanied by anger and rebellion inside. Maybe he almost breaks the screen of his cell phone every time he presses it.

I washed the dish I ate from and wiped it before putting it in the container. After that, I went upstairs to take a shower before going to sleep. I still haven't really replied to Trevor. I can only hear my cell phone ringing a few times but I still don't really pay attention to it. He will take care of that. Let him wait if he wants to know the time. He will adjust!

I looked for clothes and went straight to the shower afterwards, it didn't take me too long and I took the bathrobe to get ready for bed. But I was wrong when I thought I could sleep because I still have activities left that I need to do now.

I took out my cellphone again to reply to Trevor. But almost Li! my eyes were only one when I saw his very sweet chats with me. I scrolled up to read all of that.

Trevor Cervantes: Sherin?

Trevor Cervantes: hey, are you still there?

Trevor Cervantes: Sherin, I know, you already saw it.

Trevor Cervantes: hey! I'm asking

Trevor Cervantes: what time will we start tomorrow afternoon?

Trevor Cervantes: why are you keeping on seeing me?

Trevor Cervantes: no plans to reply?

Trevor Cervantes: are you mad at me?

Trevor Cervantes: hey

Trevor Cervantes: hey, don't forget that this is our school activity, if you don't want to be partners with me then we could reach it to our professor..

Trevor Cervantes: but we know we can't

Trevor Cervantes: just be professional

I was exhausted and breathless. Am I angry? He is so angry with me. And one more thing... I laughed sarcastically to myself. I'm still not a professional here, right? Who could this be who barely talked to me when we were planning what to do for this project? He almost doesn't answer me every time I make a suggestion and his ideas are always followed!

Are you a professional who doesn't know how to listen to what your term mate is saying?! This is the problem here, huh! And now he will pass this problem on to me that started from the beginning, it really started with him. He can talk. You thought what I did was so big. Is it wrong to put yourself first before him?!

My nose was burning with anger as I typed my reply. My head almost caught fire and exploded like a bomb.

Sherin Sanchez: SORRY AGAIN, HUH?! I EAT EARLIER AND TOOK A BATH. I LEFT MY CELLPHONE ON THE DESK AND I FORGOT TO LOG OUT MY ACCOUNT. OKAY WITH THAT?

Sherin Sanchez: 2 pm tom

He replied immediately.

Trevor Cervantes: okay take care. be careful for tomorrow.

I just liked his message and did not attempt to reply. What should I say and what does he want to hear? That... Are you careful too?! He might even attack him out of anger and annoyance when I do that. But that's the good thing, eh. So that he can feel what he is doing to me.

I always ask myself that... Why would I end up with this guy? Why are they always the only ones to be proud? When will it be time for me to make a reason for us not to talk? I'll be the one who will be angry and obey him. It's not like this that I was wooing him in the first place. Maybe if he didn't embarrass me in the eyes of our blockmates.... I'm still wooing Trevor now because I don't want us to get angry. But no, eh. He pushed me away. He chased me away like a dog begging for food.

I didn't sleep first and stayed up to read my readings. I hold the highlighter so that I can put marks on the important details in the book. It was about a historic Political event in the Philippines again year 1890's. So u really need to get to know about this more because on Monday there will be a great recitation.

I thought about going down to the living room when I felt hungry. When I got there, I met Aling Marta, we smiled and she looked at the book I was holding. "Are you still studying today, hija?" She asked me in surprise.

I yawned so I covered my mouth and nodded. "Ah, yes. There is a recitation on Monday, eh." my answer.

"Eh? You don't have school tomorrow, do you?" She asked again.

"We have an interview to do tomorrow. I have to leave and I can't spare a day for this." I said.

The old woman just nodded. "Ah, why are you here? Do you need something, hija?"

I grinned at her. "I'm going to the kitchen. I'm hungry."

SHe held me by the arm and turned to the living room. "Oh hey, sit on the sofa first, I'll just cook for you, hija." Her smile was so warm to me.

My face softened. "Are you sure? It's time for you to rest now. It's mine," I grinned at her.

"Of course, hija." She said assuring me.

That's exactly what I did and I waited in the living room while reading the book I was holding. Aling Marta also made me some milk so that while I was waiting it was not me be hungry I said it's just coffee but he was afraid that I might not be able to sleep. I'm already staying up, I'm about to drink coffee, it's not good for my health.

I didn't complain and just agreed. I can't do anything either, eh. She's like my mother, she doesn't want me to get sick. I'm not against that. I even like it and feel like I'm excited. I remember my mother because of her. I just hope he's still here, they're still here, until I become a full-fledged lawyer.

"Take this daughter." Aling Marta came to me with a white saucer in her hand. She bent down and noisily placed the thing she was holding on the coffee table. "Eat and study hard." She said before leaving.

I smiled and took the pancake that he cooked with chocolate syrup. "Thank you!" I told him enthusiastically.

It reached me at twelve o'clock immediately after reading. I just ran out of food and I'm still not done. I stood up to clean the plate and cup I used in the kitchen sink before returning to read again. I leaned on the backrest while touching the voice bridges because your eyes hurt a little.

"Oh gosh..." My brows furrowed when I heard a woman's moan all of a sudden.

"Take these off." When I heard that I was sure whose voices it was. I turned to the door and I was right, it was Cedrick and Elise kissing. Elise was leaning against the door while kissing Cedrick, her arms wrapped very tightly around Cedrick's neck.

Meanwhile, the man's hand was already massaging her chest despite her obstructing clothes.

There was something that pinched my chest while I watched them. I tried swallowing the lump that stuck in my throat. "You guys need to get a room." They all turned to me when I spoke.

"Sherin?" Elise, she was still surprised to see me.

"Are you still awake?" Cedrick asked.

I lifted the book I was reading so they could see the reason why I hadn't slept yet. I drank the milk I seasoned again before speaking.

"I have to review sorry. Go up stairs guys I won't bother you." I calmly pointed in the direction of Cedrick's room.

I looked back at the book as if what I saw didn't affect me. From here on the sofa, I could hear Elise's every moan. They did not listen to me yet, they were still making out against the door... until a few minutes later, I heard some few steps that were tapping up the stairs.

I simply looked at what they were doing and I only saw Cedrick walking. Elise was lifted by him, in a bridal style while kissing. They seemed like newlyweds getting ready for their honeymoon. Even though their distance is quite far, I can hear the sticky increase of their lips.

I felt like my heart was squeezing time after time. I watched them until they finally entered Cedrick's room, and it felt like acid was pouring into my eyes. I tried to ignore this shitty pain I currently have in my chest. I tried ignoring the scenes when Cedrick was kissing Elise thickly and romantically.

It was so different and unique compared to what he did to me.

I shook my head when I saw the tear drop on the page of my book. I shook my head when it happened one after another so I quickly closed the book and put it away from me. It was as if... My heart was burning over the untamed and crazed fire.

I took the hem of my shirt and wiped it from my eyes. I tried to fight back tears and couldn't cry anymore. I held the book tightly to stand up and entered my room. I quickly climbed the stairs as if I was running.

And when I got to the second floor, across from Cedrick's room, I heard something banging on the door. "Ohh! Ohh! Ohh..." It was Elise's moan. Even if I don't watch them, I know now that they are doing it inside. The door kept on shaking, and the woman behind it kept on moaning so loudly.

I never moaned that loud when I was fucked by Cedrick. It's only now that I realize that there is something better when it comes to the woman he loves.

I slowly walked towards my room, one step at a time, I could still hear the friction between my feet and the floor.

I couldn't stop the tears from falling. That's how sick it really is. Fate has also made me feel the pain that Elise might feel when she finds out or sees me sleeping with her boyfriend. I want to stop this pain, to stop all my connections to him but I know I couldn't.

But there's one thing I could still hinder from growing... And it's my feelings for him. The little pinch of love I felt for him. It's hard not to fall for him... Especially these past few days... He's been kind and gentle to me. I could still remember it when we were in the mall. He attempted to hold my hand but I refused the reason why he walked hurriedly because he's mad of what I did.

I thought it meant something else... But maybe he thought of me at that time as his younger cousin.

I entered my room and locked the door. I jumped on the bed and helped each other with the blanket, until despite the cries... I heard my cellphone ringing on the bed side table so I picked it up. I did not bother reading the name of the caller and I proceeded to answer it.

"What?" I was sniffing when I asked.

"I just thought of calling you at deep midnight and never thought you would answer it." It was Trevor's sleepy voice.

I wiped the tears with a blanket. I didn't understand what he was saying but I knew it was him. His voice has never been the same.

"W-What do you need?" I tried to hold back crying with every word but I couldn't... Is my voice still breaking? Shaking?

"Fuck. Are you crying?" His voice panicked after hearing my cries. That I think made him sleepy.

"No. Why did you call?" I ignored his words.

"You are. I know your voice." His voice is serious now.

I swallowed hard and wiped away the tears. I placed the cellphone properly in my mouth and spoke... "If yes, what is it to you?" I asked before hanging up on him.

I hate you Trevor.

I damn hate you...

Together with Cedrick.

You guys are the curse of my heart.