Endure the Pain

Xylo's POV

"Who said that I'll be marrying that woman?" I abruptly asked, irritated that I have to heard that right now.

Carlos was surprised with my reaction, I could see it in his facial expression. I probably looked so angry but that is what I felt right now. I have already ended things between us, I have made it clear that there will no future for us. I have made it clear months ago, even before the night where we thought that Clary was killed. Even before that, I have finished things because I have plans with Clary.

I ended it before, so I could look at Clary's eyes directly and tell her that she will not be experiencing the pain that her sister gave when she found out that we were together. I have plans with Clary, even before I lost her. It was the reason why I was busy at the castle. I am planning for leaving my position as an Alpha so that we could live together, and that I could give Clary a normal life. It was the plan, but the tragedy that night where I lost her has ended my plan too. I lost direction, I lost the motivation to move forward.

And now I am marrying someone?

"Who said that?" I asked Carlos once again, with the irritation not subsiding within me.

"Your mother had already promised the Vertina while you were away," he said which made me irritated even more. Do I have no power on my own life?

I lose it. The anger that has arised within made me impulsively leave this mountain and went directly home. I cannot be spending time with the news circling around that I am marrying that woman who has dared to hurt the woman that I love the most. I cannot be wasting time, fixing things with Clary when that fucking news is circling around. How am I supposed to face Clary when a rumor that I am going to marry is going around? I am that fucking bastard who will chase a woman while I am bound to marry. I cannot do that to the woman I love, I cannot do that to Clary.

It was already morning when I arrived at our castle, I found my mother in the garden and is looking around her flowers.

"Mother..." I coldly said.

She was quick to turn around and face me, she was shock to see me. She immediately closed the distance between us and held my face, with the worry lingering in her eyes.

"How have you been, Xylo? I have been so worried with you!" She exclaimed as she examined my body with the worry in her eyes.

Her mouth flew open and the worry in her eyes grew even more when she saw the wound on my thigh, the one that I received from Clary.

"W-what happened?" Mother asked as her hand near in my thigh started to tremble out of worry.

"It is nothing, mother." I said but she did not listen and called one of our servants to go call a doctor. "Mother, I'm fine." I said once again to caught her attention.

"Where have you been, Xylo? What's happening with you? You've been out of touch for several months!" She exclaimed. Still, the worry is evident in her actions.

"I will not marrying that Vertina, stop giving them false hopes." I straightforward said without answering all her questions about me.

I was angry for what she did. I have already told my mother before that I will not be marrying that woman, I have already told her to end things with that woman. I have nothing to to with her. I can't live with someone I do not love, not especially with someone who is full of dark desires.

"Xylo..." Mother said, probably surprised with the way I sounded as I said those words earlier.

"I'll never marry that woman." I pinpointed once again, getting tired with all these things happening around that hinder my plans.

"You were just confused, Xylo. You'll make up your mind in the future." Mother insisted and I don't want where this conversation is heading.

"I know what I want, Mother. Please don't make me repeat myself," I answered her.

She looked at me with disbelief, "son, she's your mate!"

I shook my head, still unbelieving that my mother is still not hearing what I want. "Was she really, mother? Because I don't feel any damn thing about her."

She slapped me. The thought of her slapping me sting more than the actual slap that I received. I have been respecting my mother's decision eversince, I have been following her orders...but if it will cost the woman that I really love, I would be then obligated to not follow her. I just can't lose Clary over someone that I don't love.

"I have been patient with you, Xylo! You've been neglecting your duties here! Now that you came back home, that's what I will hear from you? I did not raise you to be like that!" Mother said out of anger, she was probably so full with the stress that I gave her.

"Mother, for the first time in my life, I treasured and loved someone. Please don't make me choose." I coldly said, too fueled with the things that I want to happen.

She was surprised with my words, she took a little step back with the disbelief and disappointment in her son. I cannot believe too that I have to say those words, I just cannot believe that she will not approve my decisions about my own life.

"What's all about this?! For a dead useless woman? Are you losing your mind?!"

I clenched my jaw upon hearing those words from my mother, I cannot believe that I have to explain myself with her. I cannot believe I have to hear those words coming from her.

"You have probably endured losing father, but I am not as strong as you..."