Disapproval

Clary's POV

"The pack is waiting for you, Erina. You need to step up, it has been a long time..." My uncle, Loki said, he had been leading the pack all this time.

According to them, my mother used to be the leader of this pack and that uncle had to take the responsibility that my mother left when she died. He has been leading the pack, since then. I am so proud of my mother, she was so strong to lead this pack, they said she was like an Alpha, the strongest woman they ever knew and it was sad that I did not have the opportunity to meet my mother. But with the achievements and all the works she did for the pack, I was so amazed... as her daughter, I am so proud of her, this pack is so lovable and friendly.

'I know she's also proud of you, Clary. You fight all odds.' Cordia said.

'I hope, Cordia. But I disappointed her for losing my child.' I stated sadly.

'It is not your fault, Clary.'

'Right, it was that Andrea's fault. She must die as well.' I said darkly with anger in my head. Cordia on the other hand was silent, I know she's mad but she didn't say a word about that yet.

I looked at my Uncle Loki, it was actually my first time seeing him since the day that I woke up here in this mountain. He looks a bit of serious, his facial expression looks so strict too. Looking how his body well built, I knew he is a great leader, and knowing how the peace remained in this land, I knew he did his job well. However, there are some traces of wrinkles in his face, too, probably with all the handling of this pack and the stresses he gets from it.

"I'm afraid that I am not as good as my mother," I honestly said. With all the things that happened with my life, I do not think I am capable to lead. I have never imagine that I will be a leader one day, especially leader of a pack. Looking back, I was just a weak useless wolf that could not even fight well and now, they want me to become a leader? It was just hard to believe.

I have so many things in my mind, the recent event of me seeing Alpha of the homer pack had invaded my mind for a couple of days and I will surely be thinking of it for the next more days.

"With the blood of Vertina and Lavarejos running in your veins, you are considered to be the one of most powerful wolves in this decade. You could have been called as the Goddess of Daggers." Uncle Alfonso, who looks so sincere and serious with those words, tried to persuade me.

'You hear that Clary? Goddess of Daggers.' Cordia said trying to control the laugh that wanting to subdue in her.

If only Uncle was not that serious, I would have probably laugh in his remarks. One of the most powerful wolves? Goddess of Daggers? That sounded not me, that is definitely not me. I have lived so long that I was treated as nothing in the homer pack, and now I am being called such names. I am being assigned to be the leader, and it sounded so absurd with me. Let us say that I was born to be a leader, but I did not grew up to be one.

"Uncle, I don't think I am ready to take those responsibilities," I said. Beside from the fact that I am not knowledgeable and skilled to be a leader, I still have some plans to fulfill. Plans that seemed to be shaky right now, especially with this last event.

"No one is ever ready, Erina. Fate just chooses someone out of the unexpected circumstances." His words sounded geniuse, he is truly intelligent the he spoke. He talks smart... Comparing with him, I do not think I have words of wisdom, or the wisdom itself that would be sufficient for the race of our pack.

"The date has been chosen, delegates have already decided. You will be crowned this sunday." Uncle said.

'Goodness gracious, you're going to be a leader of the whole pack, Clary!' Cordia exclaimed unbelieving her words.

Uncle's words are enough for me to be shocked, my mouth flew open out of surprise. I cannot believe that he did went here in our place not to convince me to take the position, but to tell me that I will be crowned in that position. I cannot believe that they have already decided without my own opinion and approval.

"I apologize, the delegates have been so eager to pass your mother's legacy to you. I know that you are still in need to adjust in this pack, but the pack cannot wait anymore." He added, which made me even more pressured for the idea that the pack is waiting for me to continue the legacy that my mother had. I am not even sure if I am as strong-minded as my mother, I am not even sure if I have any thing in common with her.

'The pack accepted you, Clary. You can't reject it or you will disappoint the whole pack or...'

'... or I will disappoint my mother.' I continued her words. I should not disappoint my mother, not that I have disappointed her for losing my child but,

Sunday will only be three days from now. How am I supposed to prepare for the occasion? How am I suppossed to be knowledgeable about leading within the span of three days? I still haven't done my plans, I still haven't get the justice that my child deserves. I am still full of wrath, how can I lead with this anger rising within me? I simply can't.

Coming from my back, I felt my grand mother's hand in my shoulder. "Your uncle will be guiding you, do not worry that much. We got your back." She said as she smile while tapping my shoulders but the fear for the responsibility is still within me.

"Whatever you are planning with your previous pack, finish it as soon as possible. The pack really needs you." Uncle Loki said.

I bit my lip, unable to think clearly with everything that is happening. In three days, how am I supposed to carry out my plan? How am I supposed to get revenge in three days for those person who made my life miserable for twenty years? How am I going to make them taste hell in just three days? I wanted to ask my uncle with those questions, but it will not do anything.

At this rate, my plans are starting to get messier. It is starting to get impossible, I shouldn't be wasting time. I will probably have few more time, probably none, for myself when I get appointed as the leader of this pack. How can I carry out my plan, then? This situation is getting out of hand, I felt my plan is losing every bit. I need time, but I am losing it.

*****

"What is your plan now?" Marcus appeared out of nowhere when I am alone at the yard, practicing my daggers and archery.

I effortlessly threw my dagger towards my target, making it down for hitting it exactly where I want it to be. My degree of accuracy and precision has become so great, I cannot believe I will be having this kind of ability. I am getting stronger day by day, and my improvement seems so impossible but it happens. My day of training was like a year that I improved so fast.

"We'll take the hell with them, tonight..." I seriously said as I threw one more dagger towards my target.

I saw in my peripheral vision that my cousin's brows crossed when I said those words, probably not liking the way I sounded. He sighed as a response.

Despite the disapproval that I can see from him, he just sighed and said, "We'll be doing it tonight, then."