Planned to Suffer

Clary's POV

It was around nine in the evening when I started preparing my daggers. I did sharpen it in case that I will be needing to use it later. It is the night where I will be having the justice that both I and my child need.

I want to finish everything, I want to end it tonight.

I have never planned to make their suffering short, I want them to feel all the pain in a long period of time until they will admit their mistakes and repent from it. However, with the past events that had happened and even the occasions that will happen in the future, I do not have the time to prolong the justice that I deserve.

I am truly actually clueless with what I should do tonight, I am not sure with what to do with Andrea. I only have a short period of time to do my revenge that is why I am not prepared. This is not on my plans because the moment I talked with Uncle Loki, at has changed.

Right now all I just want is for Andrea to ask forgiveness to me and my child, I want her to beg on her knees and take responsibility with her doings. I will be a leader of a pack and I should control my temper, I should not let anger eat me, this pack needs me.

However, Andrea will never be that type of wolf who will admit her sin and take responsibility from it. She never admits her fault, it would never be easy for me to make her beg. In that case, any force might be applied and I have no plans on inhibiting myself to do such... I will kill her.

I am no saint to act like a good individual in front of someone who has killed my child. I could probably forgive her for stealing my powers or attempting to kill me, I could forgive her for hurting me. But with murdering my child? Begging would never be enough to compensate for it and I will see what I will do tonight.

My plans before has changed, I will not be playing games anymore. I will not be wasting my precious time with her anymore. But she still needs to pay for everything that she had done to me.

I never thought in my whole life before experiencing such things that I would harm others, I never thought that I will be that wolf thinking of anything but to inflict... to kill. However, as a mother who could have let my child to live a wonderful life, I cannot just forget and forgive those individuals behind it.

"Are you sure with this, Erina?" Marcus, with the worry evident in his facial expression, has said. He seems to be in doubt with me going back to that house again and do what I need to do. He seems uncomfortable and worried with that thought.

He was wearing his black oak, while I was wearing a red one.

"I cannot just sit and let them live comfortably," I said with the determination of ending things tonight... even if it means my death.

'Are you sure about this, Clary?' I heard Cordia asked.

'I have to, Cordia. If not now, then when? By the next few days I will be focusing on the pack, on my responsibilities.' I answered.

'If this is what you want, Clary. I will support you.' She said.

I am just wasn't sure if I could talk in front of Andrea though without spitting anger in her face, I don't think that is even possible.

Marcus nodded, probably thinking that any of his words wouldn't change my mind right now. He remained quiet as we travel from the Northeast mountain to the kingdom built by the homer pack.

I remained quiet, too. Too focused on thinking what would make them beg for their life and ask for forgiveness.

I was not nervous, I am just feeling neutral about it. I am actually calm tonight, not the calm that could make deals instead of justice, but the calm that could kill anyone who gets in my way. It sounded scary, it really does because I feel like I could actually kill someone. It was probably the rush that going on in my bloodstream, but my heartbeat is just peacefully beating despite of that.

This might be an offensive battle for an unknown but all I could think of is my child. I could have carried her in my arms, I could have spoiled her with everything I can, we could have gone far away from the people who can hurt her. But I can't do anything, she's gone and all those dreams has vanished with her.

Marcus and I headed right at the border. This time, we did not used chariots to hide our presence to be able to enter the kingdom. We just walked straight to it, without any fear of being harmed by the swordsmen.

Like as I have expected, Nathan was there. He was guarding the border with the other swordsman. Even before we could go near the border, he has already sensed our presence which made him alerted for the possible attack. And from my sense, I could feel that he has a sword with him and it was confirmed when he immediately attacked us when we stepped right at the border.

With my cloak covering my entire body and face, he did not recognized me. He immediately swung his sword at us as soon as we stepped right on their territory but I was able to dodge his quick attack. Marcus was also being attacked by the other swordsman and he could easily dodge it.

"What do you want from us?" Nathan asked as he swung his sword once again which I avoided swiftly using my speed, to be honest he is a strong werewolf but now, he is nothing compared to my strength. His voice sounded like he was giving a warning for us by coming in their kingdom.

I did not answer and just let him attack me, without defending myself. I was actually enjoying dodging him from his attacks and he probably still not recognized me as he keeps on attacking me with his sword.

He seemed to be a little bit frustrated every time I dodged his attacks. With the speed that I have, I can easily avoid his sword. I guess, all the trainings that I have with Marcus has helped me a so much or... this is the strength I have that was stolen from me? I don't know for now, I don't know what particular strength Andrea have stolen from me.

I am still enjoying avoiding his attacks and moving from one place to another when the hood of my cloak fell out of my head, revealing my face to Nathan. He abruptly stopped from attacking me the moment he saw my face, realizing who I was. The shock was evident in his face, horror actually filled his facial expression.

Everyone in this place believes I'm dead, who would not be surprised of seeing me alive and well? Except, Alpha Xylo, it seems like he has been expecting to see me... the moment I saw him in the dark forest, the look in his face... it seems like he knew I was alive, there must be a reason behind it, did he knew I was alive all this time? That is impossible.

I looked straight at Nathan who seems to be dumbfounded,  unable to move his feet, "You've been lacking, Nathan..." I said, trying to shake his shock away from him. However, the surprise grew even more when he heard me speaking. He was probably thinking if I came back to life after being dead months ago.

"C-Clary?" He asked, not believing what he is seeing right now but as much as I want to watch him being shocked, because I am not actually here to have a reunion with him. The night is getting deep and I have so much to accomplish tonight.

"Can we pass the border now?" I said coldly.