You look like
Even after hearing all that from him, something is still lacking. I wanted to ask more questions, I wanted to ask more details. Yet, I didn’t know where I should start. And that just isn't what makes it more complicated, sometimes the past should not be forgotten because that past takes a big part of the future.
I wondered, did he really loved me or did he just love the thought of me? The answer? How would I know? I don’t want to ask him. I’m afraid to hear his answers.
He convinced me to eat breakfast with him. I am miserably seated on the dining table while he calculates all my actions. When he put the soup in front of me, I asked him questions.
”Where is she now?”
He sighed and put the spoon in front of me.
”I’ll take you to that place when you’re ready.”
”I am ready.” I said without thinking.
He eyed me seriously. “No, you’re not. We still have a lot of talking to do and a lot of things to settle.”
I pursed my lips and looked at my soup hopelessly. He’s right. But I’m just too impatient to even wait for his conditions.
Tears started to fall again.
”Emma,” his tone is weary.
I wiped my tears immediately and acted like nothing happened. I didn’t talk to him for the entire meal. I played with my food and took three spoons of soup and that’s it. I just feel so miserable that I want to just lay on my bed.
I cried in my sleep thinking how I hoped that I could still be with my mother. But the pain that it inflicted me knowing that I was looking for someone who’s gone now. Is much worse.
Everything just feels so wrong. Suddenly, I’m lost for reasons. For all the purposes that I thought I have. What am I hoping for now? What is my reason for existing?
”B-but he told me… we’ll look for my mother if we have enough money. That’s why I agree to be sold to those men-”
”Shush,” He caressed my back and kissed my temple.
Another session of explaining and coping because he’s pursuing me to eat out for dinner. I have no appetite. I acted cold and we ended up like this.
”She’s g-gone now. She’s gone.” I cried to his chest.
”I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” he kept repeating. “I’m sorry if you have to undergo that kind of situation. You deserved the feeling of security which your father had deprived you of.”
Back then, that didn’t even cross my mind. I’m just this stagnant girl who obeys all what her father will say because she believes that after all of that, her family will be whole again.
”And that’s what I’m still trying to figure out. “ he added.
I listened to him while weeping.
”I don’t understand why he tried to hide you.” he uttered. “Amelia didn’t mention anything about him. All she talks about was you”
I was stunned for a bit. Of course, I clearly know what’s the reason for my hiding or should I say our hiding.
”He would always tell me t-that, mother and him are hiding from the authorities. Because they did something bad.”
His forehead made a crease as he listened to me.
”And do you know what they’ve done?”
I shook my head lightly.
”He wouldn’t even let me talk. Asking him will just cause another blow of physical abuse.” I avoided his gaze.
He sighed heavily and wrapped his arms around me again, casually smooching my temple.
”That just makes it all complicated. Amelia was able to live a life freely, without the means of hiding from anyone.”
I smile sadly. “At least she did.”
He soothed me again with his sweet words. I’m just so glad that he’s here to help me lighten all the burden inside me. He didn't push it all in my throat. Instead, he digs into the past slowly and naturally. Without the conversations it sounds hurtful and striking.
“I’ll let you talk to my lawyer. Your statement will add up to his verdicts.”
He said while the tip of his fingers brushed my shoulders lightly. We… kinda made the situation heated up a while ago. So we ended up naked and on top of each other. Now, I’m making his arms as a pillow while I’m hugging his body. We spend the whole night talking and soothing each other that always leads to err- making out.
”Can I ask you one last question?”
”Hmm?” he hummed as he played with the strands of my hair.
”What was your first thought when you first saw me?”
He didn’t answer right away. I had to look up to his face and saw his wandering and amused eyes.
”Uhm, that question caught me.” he smirked.
I bit my lip. He’s effortlessly handsome. People are usually looking unpleasant when they’re in bed but him? He’s out of that narrative.
”Honestly, there’s not much to say because I almost can’t see you in that black cap and jacket.”
”Huh?”
He looked down with a playful smirk.
”You were sitting when I arrived at the house. And I sat in front of you. What do you mean you can’t see me with that kind of clothes.”
”Nah.” he shook his head. “That’ not the first time I saw you.”
My lips parted. I was so damn confused.
He laughed sexily. “Oh right. Now I have words to say.”
I raised a brow.
”You look so distant… scared and fragile.”
”W-wait, I don’t get it. What do you mean?” I sat up and looked at him with full confusion.
”I saw you come out of your house on that day. I followed you. Finally, remember anything?”
”N-no! I don’t understand.”
He chuckled. “I wasn’t content to just look at you from afar. I intentionally bumped myself into you. Remember now?”
I tried hard to remember anything from that day but couldn’t. My jaw just dropped thinking if that’s actually true then that’s hell ridiculous.
”Y-you what?” I stuttered.
He smirked and sat up as well. He palmed my nape and looked at me adoringly.
”One more impression on you that day,” he ignored me.
Slowly, he brushed his lips to the side of my jaw up to my ears. I gasped and my head almost spun because of the mixed feelings I’m feeling.
”You look…like my future wife?”
I bit my lip trying to hide the ghost of a smile on my lips. I smack his chest lightly and I heard him chuckled.
”Funny?” he whispered sweetly.
”Stop flirting with me.” I said.
“I’m serious. God! What I would do to make you say yes.”
