Chapter 30: The Bad and the Ugly

Then Lisa sobbed again. I was confused, as I wanted to assure her I was serious with her. I didn’t care about her past as long as she wanted me.

“Lisa? Did I say something wrong?”

“N-no.” Lisa wailed and hid her face in my chest. “It’s the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me.”

“Then why are you crying?” I kissed her tears again.

“Because I’m too happy.” She hiccupped. “I don’t deserve you.”

I let out a long sigh. It was too confusing and frustrating for me. I wanted to see her smile. But instead, she cried because of what I said. I didn’t know what else I should do or say to her.

She lifted her face and smiled in the middle of her tears. “Do I make you frustrated?”

“Yes, my dear, you do.”

Lisa nodded. “You can leave me. Let’s think we have never met each other. I will tell my father tomorrow it’s my fault.”

I gripped her shoulders. “What do you mean? I won’t let you go. You are mine!”

Lisa laughed and then sobbed again. “You first expected a virgin, but you found me not a virgin anymore. If I tell you what happened, it would feel like a kick in your stomach.”

“Try me.”

“I …. I can’t ….”

“Why not?”

“To see you go will hurt me. But if you go knowing nothing, it will save me.” Her tears flowed heavily and wetted her beautiful face.

I took a deep breath. “What if I will stay? What if anything you say can’t move me?”

“You owe me nothing!” Lisa stared at me with tears flowing down her cheeks. “Can’t you see it? I’m giving you a way out. After that, you are free to choose anyone you want. You should thank me for that.”

“But what I want is you! You are my mate! Can’t you see?”

Lisa clenched her hands together. Her face was as if she would face the death penalty. I was sad for her, but I knew I couldn’t let her go. Never! So, I finally said, “Try me! If you will let me go, at least let me know why.”

Lisa bit her lower lip. She said nothing. We sat in silence for a few minutes. Lisa bent her face. It was complete silence; if a needle dropped, it would startle us. I thought she wouldn’t tell me, but I was wrong.

“It was ten years ago,” she said. “I was fifteen. Dad and Bill spoiled me a lot. Some werewolves also approached me because they thought I was beautiful.”

“You are beautiful, my dear.”

Lisa glanced at me, smiling. Then she resumed her story. “I only thought of men as my friends. Some approached me persistently. They gave me many things: flowers, jewelry, food, but it didn’t move me. Until there was a guy.” She gulped and bent her face.

I waited for her to continue the story. I didn’t comment because if I said something, it might stop her to tell the complete story..

“He was ten years older than me. The man approached me but didn’t give me any special attention. He had never given me any gifts. Instead, the man played hot and cold with me until I finally missed him. Later, I wanted to meet him every day.”

Lisa bit her lower lip and turned her back on me. She hugged her knees and took a deep breath. After a while, she continued again. “The guy kept playing hot and cold with me. Finally, one day, I thought I had fallen for him. He invited me to come to his place. I was ecstatic because I thought all my efforts were fruitful. But I was wrong ….”

She bent her head on her knees and sobbed. “When I was there, we were alone. He closed my eyes with blindfolds and tied my hands. I thought he wanted to play with me. But then ….” Lisa shook her head. “I can’t tell you the rest.”

I took a deep breath as I guessed what had happened. I pulled Lisa into my embrace and kissed her forehead. “If it’s too hurtful, you don’t need to tell me the rest. I have already guessed it ….”

“Will you leave me now?”

“No, Lisa. It was the past. We have the present and the future. So I won’t leave you.”

“W-what did you think? What is your guess?” Lisa’s voice trembled.

“The guy raped you ….”

Lisa sobbed. “Yes, but not only that …. There were ten other guys …. They were those I rejected and wanted revenge on me. I fought and killed three of them, but I was also hurt badly. The seven of them and the first guy raped me.” Her body shook severely. She covered her face with both hands.

“Lisa ….”

“Can you please leave me now? I’ve been ruined …. I’m trash ….”

“No, you are not!”

“Tell me how you can see me and don’t want to puke because of knowing eight guys have touched my body?”

I hugged Lisa tightly as it hurt me too. But I could feel her pain.

“When I told you I was sexually active, it was a lie. I didn’t want you to know my past!” Lisa whimpered and bent her head. Her tears fell on my arm.

“When you asked me to mate with you, was it a lie too?”

Lisa shook her head. “No, I want you. I have let no man touch me. Never again after what happened ten years ago. But I want you to do it ….” She laughed and cried simultaneously. “I’m crazy, huh? How can I expect to have you? What a greedy bitch I am.”

“No, Lisa. You are not greedy, my dear.” Then I pulled her to face me. I lifted her face and kissed her tenderly on the forehead. “I have fallen for you. It’s like lightning strikes. Maybe it’s too fast, but I feel it strongly here.” I brought her hand to my chest, right on my heart. “Can you feel that?”

My heart beat fast. Lisa blushed and bit her lip again.

“No matter what happened in the past, I’m here. I won’t leave you. Please give me a chance. Give us a chance.”